More common than one might think, women have little to no desire for sex. This does not necessarily mean that nothing happens in bed, but it can cause relationships to fail if left unchecked.“Not tonight, honey, I have a headache.” A statement that is seen as typical for women. However, it is more common than you might think. Not the headache, but the low (or absent) sex drive. The decrease in need can occur after pregnancy, after menopause, after surgery on the ovaries or uterus, but also due to psychological problems.

Sexual need disorder

With sexual desire disorder (also known as asexuality), there is a lack of sexual attraction or desire for sexual activities. Although this can also be done consciously (e.g. celibacy), this involves an involuntary decrease in the need and interest in sex. This isn’t necessarily about a lack of excitement, but really about need.Not only is there no need to have sex or perform sexual acts, but there are also few erotic fantasies. Once it has become the habit of avoiding sex and if the partner starts to make less and less effort (e.g. not to complain, because it also becomes less fun if his wife does not show any interest in it), it is still difficult to the vicious circle.

Causes

The sexual disorder can be generalized and present from an early age, but can also be situational. In that case, the person is not interested in the current partner, but is not necessarily uninterested in sex itself. In another case of an acquired sexual disorder, it concerns a general decrease in interest, which is not necessarily focused on the partner himself.In addition to the causes mentioned earlier, there are several possible reasons why a limited libido can arise. It can be caused by drug use, alcoholism, and anemia. In addition to these physical causes, common psychological causes include depression, stress, anxiety and relationship problems.

Therapy

Treatment mainly depends on what is causing the problem.When it occurs after pregnancy , it is often caused by fatigue and the emotional bond with the baby. It is important not to fall into this “trap”, where it is easy to avoid sex (especially after it often no longer happens in the last weeks of pregnancy). It is therefore important to take moments when the baby has a sitter to spend together with the partner. A little quality time can therefore be enough to increase the need.When it occurs after menopause, this is often due to a decrease in hormone production. However, this does not necessarily mean that sexual intercourse does not have to take place. In fact, there are often positive aspects to this period and age, because there is no longer any chance of pregnancy and there is less chance of disruption because the children are out of the house.When it arises from psychological problems , especially depression, it is best to first look for a solution to the psychological problem. Often the absence of need then disappears on its own with the decrease in depressive thoughts. Depression can also occur after the operations mentioned above. Therapy aimed at depression can then be effective.If the sexual disorder has arisen due to other problems, i.e. is a consequence of another disorder or problem, it is best to tackle this “main problem”.