Within femdom (a relationship in which the woman is dominant) there are various areas of interest that a sub (a submissive within BDSM, Bondage, Discipline, Sadism, Masochism) can delve into or be trained in. Those areas are: discipline, deprivation, servitude, pain and pleasure. What these areas entail and what types of things can be learned can be read below. There are two basic principles within BDSM: dominance by a woman (femdom) and dominance by a man (maledom). Men and women generally have different principles and areas of interest in which they would like to train their subs (submissive partners). This article focuses on the femdom side of that entire spectrum, within which five areas can be distinguished: discipline, deprivation, servitude, pain and lust.

Discipline

Discipline is learning to correctly apply the applicable rules within a D/s (this is what the relationship between a dominant and a sub is called). These rules are usually determined in consultation, although there are also femdominas who only rely on their own rules, without further consultation with their sub. By repeating the rules a lot, a form of conditioning follows. Consider, for example, certain positions that a sub must be able to take on command, or the correct forms of address and way of talking. Another application within the discipline is actual discipline, which is often used as a synonym for punishment. Within femdom, these are usually ‘old-fashioned’ punishments such as standing in the corner and spanking (the BDSM word for slapping the buttocks).

Deprivation

Deprivation is another term for denial. Within femdom, this mainly concerns denial of attention and sex. Within a defined game, attention deprivation is also an interesting one. Denying attention means only giving attention to a sub when the dominant needs it. Claiming, whining and asking for attention are punished.Sexual denial usually takes place within a ‘tease and denial’ game. The dominant woman turns her sub partner on, but he is only allowed to cum when she gives permission. If she does not do this, the sub will remain unsatisfied.

Service

Service is a broad spectrum: it ranges from properly running a household to giving the perfect massage. The ultimate goal of properly training a sub in servitude is that he does not so much follow all instructions, but anticipates the needs of his dominant in advance.

Pain

Pain comes in many degrees. Within a D/s, the infliction of pain is usually only done in the form of punishment, or to test the limits of a submissive’s permissiveness. Within the relationship between a sadist (someone who enjoys inflicting pain) and a masochist (someone who enjoys experiencing pain), pain has a completely different function. The levels of pain applied there are often much higher.

Lust

A femdomina often uses her subs to satisfy her own lustful feelings. By the way, that is exactly the same attitude that male dominants usually have. Since she has total control over whether or not her sub is allowed to orgasm, it gives a considerable form of power. Within this area, a sub is trained to please his dominant as best as possible.